Saturday, July 18, 2009

Fashion Sense Asks if Big Love Deserves an Emmy or a Cancellation

Big Love got an Emmy nomination for best drama, and though I've only been able to tolerate watching it for a few minutes, I have a very strong opinion about it. [Click on the image for a larger version of this cartoon. The text reads: 'Leda came over while the rabbit and I were doing aerobics, and she said, "Did you hear 30 Rock got 22 Emmy nominations?" and I stopped exercising and said, "Yeah, but unfortunately Big Love was nominated for best drama," and she said, "The show about the guy with three wives?" and I said, "That's the one," and she said, "I watched it for about five minutes and I couldn't stand to see those women competing over the same man and raising his kids within sight of each other," and I said, "The Mormon church outlawed polygamy but apparently lots of people in Utah and Arizona still live that way," and she said, "They seem to be able to have a lot of kids fast -- if that's the kind of thing you're into," and I said, "Rabbits aren't monogamous, which is probably why they're such legendary breeders," and we both looked at my rabbit, and he nodded his agreement, and Leda said, "But you would think humans would realize the earth is straining under the weight of nearly seven billion of us, so we don’t need to fixate on reproduction," and I said, "So are there any shows about women with more than one husband? And would that be better?" and she said, "I don’t know, but in that case the men would be the ones who would have to compete with each other for the wife's attention, rather than the reverse. There would probably be a lot of conflict," and I said, "I don’t think I’d like a show about that either," and Leda said, "I'm sure some politicians are fans of Big Love. I mean if we legalized polygamy in the U.S., guys like Mark Sanford wouldn't have to sneak to Argentina," and I said, "Yeah, I guess you're right; in a country as pro-marriage as this one, polygamy is the only way for these guys to get what they want," and she said, "What a thought," and she took out her phone, and I said, "Please don't Tweet about it -- you don't want to start a trend," and she said, "I'm not. I just wanted to make a movie of your rabbit doing aerobics," which she did and then posted it on YouTube, and my rabbit has hopes it will go viral because he wants to star in an all-rabbit version of Big Love.']

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Fashion Sense Comments on the Death of Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson's death last week was a shock. [Click on the image for a larger version of this cartoon. The text reads: 'When my cousin stopped by to borrow some of my CDs for her Fourth of July party, I was reading an article about Michael Jackson's funeral arrangements, and when she saw it she said, "That's disgusting," and I said, "Disgusting that I buy gossip magazines when I could read this stuff for free on the internet?" and she said, "No, disgusting that they're making such a fuss over Michael Jackson," and I said, "The rats always liked him because his first solo hit, Ben, was about a rat," and she said, "But he was a pedophile," and I said, "I don't think that was ever proven," and she said, "And he was a lunatic that kept changing his face, and he had the audacity to die owing $400 million," and I said, "He really was the King of Pop," and she said, "Now you sound just like everybody else," and I said, "You know that's not something I hear every day," and she said, "I don't understand how you can make excuses for somebody who lived a wildly extravagant lifestyle, which I know you don't approve of, and even kept a chimpanzee as a pet, which I also know you don't approve of. Name one good thing about him," and I said, "He was a historic figure who forced MTV to acknowledge African-American performers and he challenged stereotypes," and she said, "Well, I don't plan to borrow any of your Michael Jackson CDs for my party," and I said, "That's your loss. On the day Michael died, the rats and I listened to Thriller three times, and I taught them to moonwalk," and she said, "I think you like Michael Jackson because he was so strange he makes you seem normal by comparison," and I said, "I thought that was why everybody loves celebrities!"']

Friday, June 19, 2009

Fashion Sense Comments on Mad Mel

In announcing that he's going to divorce his wife and that his girlfriend is pregnant, Mel Gibson has shown himself to be a hypocrite. Previously, he's shown himself to be a bigot. Here at Fashion Sense we just couldn't resist commenting on Mad Mel. [Click on the image for a larger version of this cartoon. The text reads: 'I'm under a lot of stress, so I'm doing yoga to try to relax, but my cat saw a picture of Mel Gibson and his pregnant girlfriend, and he was, like, Why is Mel Gibson divorcing his wife to be with Oksana? I thought he was supposed to be Catholic? and I said, "He claims to be," and the cat was, like, But I thought Catholics didn't believe in divorcing somebody you have seven kids with to be with somebody younger and hotter, and I said, "I guess Mel belongs to a very special Catholic group," and my cat was, like, So was the passion in The Passion of the Christ about the crucifixion or something else? and I said, "It's the passion of the Mel that's about something else," and the cat was, like, So now he's going to have eight kids? and I said, "Yeah, I guess he actually called himself the Octo-Mel on Leno last week," and the cat was, like, Look at this picture of his new girlfriend -- doesn’t she look a little like Nadya Suleman? and I said, "So what's your point?" and the cat was, like, It makes me wonder if the Octo-Mel craves the Octo-Mom , and I said, "I'm not crazy about Nadya, but she's less of a hypocrite than he is," and my cat was, like, Nor has she gone on any anti-Semitic rants while intoxicated, and I said, "That's another point in her favor. Just FYI, there's going to be a new musical called The Octo-Mom and an Octo-Mom reality show," and my cat was, like, The words reality and Octo-Mom don't seem to go together, and I said, "I guess we have to try to be tolerant of Nadya... and of Mel," and my cat was, like, Why? Mel isn't very tolerant, and I said, "Because tolerance is important, and besides Mel as Mad Max has shown us what the world could be like when we reach peak oil if people are cruel and intolerant," and my cat was, like, Now I'm the one that's feeling stressed. Do you know anything about yoga for cats? ']

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Fashion Sense Says Lack of Health Insurance Not Oprah Is the Cause of Health Worries

Oprah is being criticized for her willingness to discuss alternative medicine, but the biggest threat to the health of citizens of the United States is our lack of decent health insurance coverage. [Click on the image for a larger version of this cartoon. The text reads: 'My sister called me and the first thing she said was, "Did you hear that Newsweek has exposed Oprah's fraudulent healthcare advice?" and I said, "Yes, and I also heard that Forbes says Angelina Jolie is now the world's most powerful celebrity, but I don't believe everything I read," and she said, "If people get more cautious about alternative medicine, it could have a bad effect on your leech therapy business," and I said, "As it turns out, I've decided to give up my leech therapy business and do some part-time petsitting instead," and she said, "But you have to care about the fact that people do what Oprah tells them to do, and these untested natural treatments can have bad side effects," and I said, "That's one part truth to a million parts propaganda," and she said, "That sounds like a toxic homeopathic remedy," and I said, "People certainly have to exercise caution, but the real cause of health care problems in the U.S. is lack of a real health care system," and she said, "But aren't you disturbed by what Oprah is doing?" and I said, "I found Suzanne Somers' description of injecting hormones into her lady parts far more disturbing," and my sister thought for a minute and said, "I guess I'll have to agree with you on that one."']

Monday, May 25, 2009

Fashion Sense Says It's Illogical to Rave Over the New Star Trek

Here at Fashion Sense, we've seen the new Star Trek movie and honestly don't understand all the rave reviews. We still prefer Star Trek IV (Save the Whales!). [Click on the image for a larger version of this cartoon. The text reads: 'When Penny came over to my house last night she said, "Where's your monkey?" and I said, "Peanut wasn't very happy with me, so I let him go live in a primate sanctuary," and she said, "You must be really lonely without any animals around," and I said, "I adopted a couple of whales through a wildlife conservation group. There's a picture of my humpback’s tail," and she said, "Too bad he can't live here," and I said, "He could if Scotty would make him a transparent aluminum aquarium like in Star Trek IV," and she said, "Speaking of Star Trek, did you see the new movie?" and I said, "I was very disappointed. Star Trek is supposed to be full of meaningful if obvious references to real-life problems, and now it's just another action-adventure franchise," and she said, "You know, there weren't many carry-overs from the old movies or TV shows, though they did manage to include a green Orion animal woman in a bikini," and I said, "At least the original sexism survived," and she said, "And they killed off most of the Vulcans so Spock could announce he was a member of an endangered species," and I said, "Whereas in Star Trek IV Spock was trying to help an endangered species, namely humpback whales, " and she said, "Well, the new movie was a huge hit, so I suppose it's nice to see an old favorite like Star Trek live long and prosper," and I said, "I find your attitude most illogical."']

Monday, May 11, 2009

Fashion Sense Says Michael Savage's Ideas About Immigrants are Unhealthy

The world is still waiting to see how bad the swine flu outbreak will get. Although everyone's concerned about staying healthy, some people, like shock jock Michael Savage, are using this crisis to spread unhealthy ideas. Also, this flu outbreak is a good reason to take a critical look at factory farms. [Click on the image for a larger version of this cartoon. The text reads: 'When I was on my way to visit my rescued Premarin mare this morning, my right-wing neighbor waved at me as though she had some kind of emergency, so I stopped to see what she wanted, and she said, "Hey! Are any Mexicans on that farm where you keep your horse?" and I asked why, and she said, "Michael Savage says you shouldn't get anywhere near Mexicans or anybody who's been anywhere near Mexicans, because you'll get sick," and I said, "From what I've read, Michael Savage is the one who's sick. Experts say this swine flu originated in the United States," and she said, "We're not supposed to call it swine flu. That's bad for the pork industry. Which reminds me that I'm also angry at the Mexicans for putting that virus into pigs because now I can't eat pork chops or ham, which are my favorites, and later on they'll be more expensive," and I said, "We're not supposed to call it swine flu because agribusiness has so much power they can sue us for defamation when we tell the truth about them. Remember what happened to Oprah when she tried to talk about beef?" and she said, "So are there any Mexicans on that farm?" and I said, "I don't think it's funny to talk about the Aporkalypse, but I also don't think it's the Mexicans that are responsible for this Snoutbreak," and she said, "Well, here's more proof for you: I got one of those e-mail messages telling me that Salma Hayek has swine flu, and I thought, 'She's Mexican, so it's got to be true,' and when I opened the email I got a virus on my computer which proves that Mexicans give you viruses," and I said, "That's some very twisted logic!" and she said, "Thanks. I’ve done a lot of thinking about this thing."']

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Fashion Sense Comments on Mad Tea Parties

Huffington Post called them faux populism; Paul Krugman described them as astroturf events; Fashion Sense thinks it's sad that the mad tea parties wasted so much tea and got more media attention than Earth Day events. [Click on the image for a larger version of this cartoon. The text reads: 'On Earth Day the dog and I went to the Save the Planet rally organized by our environmental group L.O.V.E., and afterward Marissa invited us to her house for tea, and she made a big pot of organic green, and then she said, "I'm drinking a lot of tea these days as a protest against those tax revolt teabaggers because they're not a real movement no matter what Fox News says," and I said, "Paul Krugman called those tea parties astroturf events -- as in fake grassroots," and she said, "A grassroots group like ours has to work hard to get any publicity, whereas those tea protestors just let Fox News do it for them," and I said, "What difference does it make? No matter what they do at their mad tea parties, it'll always be the 'Obama is the Antichrist' t-shirts that we'll remember them by," and she said, "And all the tea they wasted!" and I said, "I doubt if any of it was organic. Tonight after dinner the dog and I will watch the news to see how they cover the rally. We don't usually get much of a mention unless the anarchists show up and make some trouble, or a Hollywood star puts in a cameo," and she said, "Well, that’s at least one consolation: The environmental movement always gets lots of great celebrities, but all the teabaggers could come up with was Ted Nugent and Glenn Beck."']